Addictive
by BunBunBun
Summary: A near-death experience leaves Jack hopeful and the Doctor with an unhealthy addiction. What starts as an experiment turns into a relationship, but can it ever last? Jack x Doctor
1. Discovery

**Addictive  
**A Doctor Who Fan Fiction

_Disclaimer_: Doctor Who and its lovable characters belong to the BBC.

_Setting_: Somewhere, somewhen with the Doctor and Jack travelling together, told mainly from Jack's point of view.  
(The details aren't really that important, but let's just say that Jack agreed when the Doctor asked him to tag along after the year that never was)

_Pairing_: Jack x Doctor (mainly Ten, later Eleven)

_Warnings_: Adult situations and some drama (as you might guess from the summary)  
Also, mentions of addictions (while this story deals with a rather uncommon kind of addiction, I should probably point out that all this, and most drugs in general, are neither healthy nor romantic in real life)

_Notes_: So here we go, with a story that's been ghosting around my head for a month now. The idea of the Doctor growing addicted to Jack's kisses is something that could come straight out of a kink-meme (but actually didn't), and it just would not leave me alone until an actual plot had grown around it.

* * *

**Discovery**

Shining brightly, the sun lit his way as Captain Jack Harkness was walking proudly, for he had once again saved the day.

The town had been evacuated, yet besides the missing population, nothing indicated how close this entire civilization had come to total extinction. Asides from Jack and the Doctor, only a selected few had joined the battle, and yet they had succeeded at last.

He had made sure the bomb had been disintegrated rather than merely disarmed. Normally, this would not solve the problem, for the people would have to learn acting responsibly at one point in time – but this particular bomb had never been built on that planet in the first place. Rather, it had been a means by alien invaders to force the local population into submission.

Luckily, though, Jack had taken care of the bombs. In the meantime, the Doctor had been negotiating to the actual aggressors and, judging by the departure of the space ships above, he had succeeded in doing so.

A wide grin spread on Jack's features as the familiar blue box he had become a frequent passenger of appeared in his field of vision. Right next to an actual police station, it stood exactly where they had left it.

Another day, another good deed. While their mission had progressed rather tediously at first, they had, for once, not met any serious difficulties – well, as far as Jack could tell, at least.

Hopefully, he would find the Doctor in a good enough mood for him to finally join Jack on his party tours. He had been hearing about that marvelous new intergalactic bar, but was having a hard time in convincing his friend to actually tag along. Apparently, the Doctor, or at least this incarnation of him, was not that much of a drinker – and yet Jack figured that getting his friend to loosen up every once in a while would really benefit both of them.

The two of them had their own burdens to carry, and both of them dared mentioning those far too rarely. They had been traveling together for quite a while already, so why was it still so hard to get the time lord to open up to him?

With a heavy sigh, Jack unlocked the Tardis and stepped inside. He did not expect the Doctor to have returned yet, but...something still felt out of place somehow.

He smelled the air and was alerted in an instant. A closer look at the ground confirmed what his nose had already told him.

Blood.

A rustling to his right alerted him to another presence. His head whirled around to make out the source and...

His heart nearly stopped at the sight of the Doctor leaning heavily against a pillar...covered in what could only be his own blood. "Their leaders did not know about the bombs…and apologized for the misunderstanding," the time lord explained with a dry smile, "Unfortunately, the true culprit…was standing right behind me all the while." With a pained grimace, he lifted the hand covering his abdomen to reveal a gashing wound. "I'm afraid...I'll have to regenerate," he added weakly and slid down against the pillar with a heavy fit of coughs.

After approaching hesitantly, _disbelievingly_, at first, Jack all but jumped the final distance in order to catch his friend in his arms. "No, you can't," he whispered, cradling the shaking time lord gently, "not yet."

He had been planning to ask the Doctor out on, err, a _casual date amongst friends_.

He was not prepared to see the time lord die nor regenerate on him.

He was not prepared for that at all.

"I don't want to, either," the Doctor replied with another weak smile and dazedly looked at his bloodied right hand..which left a trace of golden light in its wake already, "I guess you should get some distance."

Breathing heavily, Jack only tightened his grasp on the time lord. This was not easy on both of them, he realized that. He was confused, and he was unprepared, and he wanted to help his friend in this dire time of need, but all he could think about was...that he did not want him to change.

Taking a deep breath, Jack pulled the Doctor even closer and understood too late that even that little movement intensified the pain his friend was in.

But he couldn't help it. It wasn't fair. He had barely gotten this Doctor to warm up to him – and he was far from done with him yet.

So what if Jack had grown to love his talkative ways? What if he had always considered him attractive? What if some part of him had always hoped that, one day, there was a chance for _more_?

None of that would matter anymore...if this Doctor, _his_ Doctor, was suddenly replaced by somebody else. Somebody new who was still him somehow, and yet so very different. What if the new Doctor would not like him anymore? What if he would even choose to send him away, returning to his old, cruel argumentation of Jack being wrong in his very nature?

So much could happen, and Jack could not bear thinking about any of these scenarios. But he could not mention his fears either, could he? There was no helping it, for he could not save him. He was losing his Doctor here and now, and there was nothing he could do but hold onto him even more tightly.

Even though Jack had tried to be fair enough not to burden his friend with his own fears, his actions were enough to give him away. "I'll still be me," the Doctor reassured him in a very quiet voice and closed his eyes. As Jack did his very best to memorize the face he had grown to like so very much, he painfully realized that he would never get to see those eyes again. He would never hear that voice rambling again. And... he would never get the chance to experience a kiss from that mouth.

With another deep intake of air, Jack gathered all his courage. "And yet, this you was brilliant," he offered with a rueful smile, leaned forward...and dared stealing that kiss after all.

If the Doctor was surprised, he did not show it. Perhaps, it was too late for him to even notice.

But to Jack it meant the world.

He had not kissed the time lord since Satellite Five. Back then it had really been nothing but a goodbye kiss. On that notion… it was one this time, too.

But Jack had changed since then. He had become immortal, and he had noticed long ago that even something as human as kissing felt different now.

But this...just now, with the Doctor...this short, shy brushing of lips…even though it was not an actual kiss at all it literally took Jack's breath away.

Reluctantly he pulled away at last, casting another sad look at his friend's still form. If he had known it would feel as intense as this...he would have harassed his Doctor much sooner. As a matter of fact, he should have harassed him sooner no matter what.

But at least, he had this moment. The calm before the storm.

In this very moment, resting calmly in his arms, the Doctor was his and his only. Jack smiled softly. The time lord almost looked peaceful. How long would that peace last? How long until regeneration forced another personality onto his dear friend?

Jack tried to find any indicators, but was startled to find the golden glow... entirely gone. If it was not for the enormous amount of blood they were covered in, he would have guessed the Doctor to just have fallen asleep in his arms.

Jack's heart skipped a beat.

What if regeneration had failed? _What if he had died?_ But...the Doctor was breathing, wasn't he? Anxiously, Jack checked his friend's pulse with shaky hands. Thankfully, though, it seemed normal enough. It was then that another curious detail caught his attention. The stab wound looked different.

Carefully lowering his friend to the ground, Jack moved to take a closer look – only to find the injury gone.

His eyes widened.

This…

Had he done this? Had that short kiss been enough for his strange immortality to get a hold of the Doctor, too?

A single tear ran down Jack's face as he allowed himself to pull the sleeping time lord into another hug. No matter how it had happened – the Doctor was alive and well and if Jack was lucky...he would stay _his_ Doctor for many years to come.

* * *

_Notes:_ So how do you like it so far? I'll try to update on a daily basis, but some feedback really helps with that, so please review? In any case, thanks for reading!


	2. Agreement

**Agreement**

"Thank you so very much," the mayor admitted almost tearfully as she shook their hands, "I really wish there were more people like you."

The Doctor grinned back brilliantly. "Oh, I'm pretty sure the universe can't handle more than the two of us," he joked and turned on his heels. With a final nod towards the townsfolk, Jack joined his friend on his walk back to the Tardis.

Another day, another good deed.

This time, things really had gone smoothly. So maybe this time, he would get the time lord to join him on a drink?

"We're not celebrating this in some intergalactic bar, Jack," the Doctor cut him off before he could even suggest it, "not if there's so much more to do!" Looking up at the sky, the time lord grinned at the prospect of their next grand adventure.

And, honestly, Jack did not even mind being told off any longer. It had become a bit of a running gag, really – after every trip that left him feeling good, he would suggest a tiny celebration the Doctor would decline every single time.

He really would have liked doing something relaxing for once, but well, he was happy enough just to keep travelling with his friend.

Especially if said friend was still in one piece at the end of the day, that is.

Ever since the day he had almost lost _his_ Doctor, neither of them had been fatally wounded. But of course they had taken some time evaluating the time lord's miracle healing. Eventually, they had concluded that yes, it had been Jack's overly alive nature that had saved him. Maybe that particular aspect of his powers would come in handy again, but he was also grateful no further occasion to test it had come up yet.

He preferred the Doctor safe, sound and rambling about basically anything, really. Speaking of which... Jack noticed the Tardis, which they had just entered, was much more quiet than usual. For once the Doctor did not talk at all.

The immortal frowned and found his friend watching him curiously. "Jack?" the time lord probed almost...carefully.

Naturally, Jack's frown only deepened at that. "What is it?" he replied, joining his friend at the console.

"How do you feel about me?" the Doctor asked out of the blue and tilted his head with a frown of his own, "...about _us_?"

Jack froze for a moment, uncertain whether he had actually heard that one right. "What _about_ us?" he responded in confusion, trying feebly to mask his shock at being found out with the confusion he felt about the suddenness of the topic.

Thankfully – or maybe not so – the Doctor did not seem to notice his poorly disguised uneasiness. "I've been wondering about how you basically revived me that day," he explained matter-of-factly, "and I can't help thinking that it would be worthwhile to find out what effects your...power?...really has on me." His eyes met Jack's and he arched an eyebrow. "If you're okay with that, that is," he added carefully and rambled on at the same speed as before, "I mean, I can't claim I didn't feel that intriguing sensation when you kissed me, but more importantly, we shouldn't conduct any experiments if actual emotions are involved." His roller-coaster ride of a speech came to an abrupt end with him watching Jack expectantly.

The immortal, however, needed quite a while to even stomach that proposition, let alone phrase a coherent answer. "Just to get that straight," he spoke slowly, watching the Doctor very carefully while trying not to give away too much of his own thoughts, "You want me to kiss you? _Repeatedly?_"

The Doctor tilted his head in consideration. "Well, anything else with a similar effect would suffice, too," he explained, "but shaking hands obviously does not work the same, so either it really needs to be a kiss, or you have to consciously will your energy onto someone else."

Jack just kept frowning. Of course this would, theoretically, get him closer to the Doctor. Of course he would love to actually relive that strangely fascinating experience of kissing him, but he could not deny that he did have a tiny crush on his friend...or could he? Obviously the Doctor did not reciprocate that feeling. In any case, hesitating too long would give him away, so Jack chose to simply bluff his way through this. "Sooo," he drawled with a sly grin, "if you accompany to that bar, I might just consider giving in to your whims."

The Doctor frowned. "This is not a date, Jack," he clarified slowly.

Jack replied with a half-hearted laugh, "It was worth a try, though, wasn't it?"

As their eyes locked, both kept silent for a long moment. "This is a bad idea," the Doctor admitted at last, "I felt like I should at least ask, but...just forget I mentioned it." With another thoughtful frown, he turned his attention to the console screen.

Jack, however, was not willing to give up that easily. "I never said it was a bad idea," he offered with a shrug and barely even waited for his friend to meet his eyes again.

Actually, he _did_ agree that it was a bad idea, but at the same time it was too good an opportunity to pass up.

And so he simply gave in to an urge he had grown used to suppressing and pulled the Doctor into a kiss – not short, not long, but almost as _intense_ as last time, even with the time lord caught off guard like that...or maybe just because of that.

They parted again sooner than he liked, and the Doctor's thoughtful frown helpfully reminded him of how it had not been a real kiss in the first place. "This is...definitely intriguing," the time lord summarized, licked his lips absent-mindedly and experimentally flexed his fingers, "I feel a bit like an overcharged battery, for the lack of a better description."

Watching his friend's wonder, Jack could not help chuckling in spite of himself. He did not mind it was not real, because he, for one, had thoroughly enjoyed it. And well, no matter how you looked at it, this definitely was something worth exploring. "Just for the record," he added as an afterthought, "It's not only me who's unusual here. You taste much more...intense than most species I've tried."

It was meant to be a compliment, but the Doctor looked up at him sharply. Soon a grin spread on his features. "Then that statement's quite representative for the whole universe, is it?" he joked.

Jack almost blushed at his unfortunate choice of words, but decided to laugh it off instead, "You really may consider yourself special, then."

* * *

_Notes_: And so the experiment begins, but is it really _that_ bad an idea? We'll find out! Thank you for reading this, and please, please review!


	3. Addiction

**Addiction**

He trudged somewhere, anywhere, under a brilliant blue sky that would no longer exist if they had not arrived just in time to save the planet.

Another day, another good deed.

But this time, Jack had been of no help at all. He had sworn to himself never to part with the Doctor unless absolutely necessary, and yet a mere decoy had succeeded in luring him away with just the right timing for him to lose sight of his friend. The Doctor, meanwhile, had been busy pursuing his own leads, and obviously he had done just fine without Jack.

It hurt the immortal's pride to be useless like that, but well, at least now he was needed for other...services, too. Just as the Tardis conveniently materialized only a few feet away from his, Jack could not help grinning in anticipation.

They had hesitated at first, and yet they had always deemed their kisses to be worthwhile enough for a next time to take place. As a matter of fact, the Doctor had at one point admitted to actually _like_ the strange sensation that was so unique to Jack's kisses in particular. Then again, though, they had never ventured any further than that. He had suggested that at one point, though:

* * *

"Do we..." Jack rasped with a small grin and a nod towards the corridor, "...want to take this somewhere else?"

As he followed his gaze, the Doctor's dazed expression turned into a deep frown. "Jack, you do remember we're trying to find the reason for that strange...attraction, do you?" he pointed out flatly, "I'm pretty sure..." He hesitated and lowered his gaze to remind both of them of how their bodies were still pressed against each other quite firmly, "...making out like this will absolutely suffice."

Jack arched an eyebrow, but did not fail to notice the forced objectivity in the Doctor's voice. The time lord was trying to observe their...experience from a neutral point of view, yet if his accelerated heart beat was any indication, he was enjoying this almost as much as Jack himself did.

* * *

If asked what he wanted, Jack would always answer "More." But unfortunately, it was not his choice to make...not yet. He was happy enough with what strange circumstances they had agreed on, no matter how twisted they may look from the outside. He could take not going any further just as he could take the Doctor not returning his affection in the way he would have preferred.

Jack would just enter the Tardis and keep going like they always had, kissing the Doctor as the friend he was but like the lover he wanted to be.

Sometimes, love meant to endure.

And sometimes... enduring meant watching loved ones suffer.

The scene greeting him in the console room felt eerily similar. In the dim light he could only make out the Doctor on second sight...for he was leaning heavily against one of the pillars, standing on shaky legs and looking absolutely horrible. "Jack, we need to," the time lord whispered in a disturbingly hoarse voice, "...talk."

The immortal hurried to his friend's side at once, but the Doctor motioned for him to stay away with a shaky hand.

Jack's worried gaze grew even more confused. "Doctor, whatever got you won't affect me anyway, remember?" he spoke and stepped just a bit closer, "What happened to you?"

The time lord returned his look tiredly. "We forgot to include some very real risk in our hypothesis," he explained without saying anything.

Naturally, Jack was growing more and more agitated. "What hypothesis?" he demanded, "What are you talking about?"

With a tired smile, the Doctor carefully lowered himself to the ground, for, frankly, he did not appear to be able to keep standing much longer anyway. "I only navigated the Tardis here because I knew that is where I lost you," he explained and motioned for Jack to sit down as well. "To me, saving this planet actually took about eight weeks."

Jack arched an eyebrow. "That could as well have been four...or less," he replied quietly, "If you knew where to find me, you could have just picked me up earlier to help with the remaining tasks, you know." It was true – he really hated being useless, especially if that left the Doctor in a condition like, well, this one.

"To be honest, I just didn't really know what was going on," the time lord offered with a light grimace, "It took the local scientists quite a while to assemble the counter-measure, and when they were done..." He lifted his hand for demonstration. "...my fingers had suddenly started trembling."

Finally, Jack took the time to properly assess his friend. He did not appear to be wounded this time, but with pale skin and dark circles around his eyes he looked awfully sickly instead. To top that off, Jack could swear the Doctor had lost some weight, too. "Even if it's a lethal illness," he offered slowly, "I might be able to cure that, just like last time."

The Doctor actually chuckled at that. "That's just it," he whispered and looked up at the ceiling, "You can just kiss me better, but the problem is that this is what caused this condition to begin with."

Jack's eyes widened as he was beginning to catch on to what his friend was saying.

"So before we decide on how to get me out of this pitiful state," the Doctor explained shakily, "I need you to understand that these are really just withdrawal symptoms."

_Holy shit._

Sighing unevenly, the Doctor met Jack's gaze again. "Captain Jack Harkness," he announced with a dry, humourless laugh, "I've officially grown addicted to you."

* * *

_Notes_: They've gotten themselves into quite a mess, haven't they? Six more chapters to go, but for now, please review! :)

Edit: many thanks to KnucklesEch for the lovely review! That really made my day :3


	4. Decisions

**Decisions**

"I wish I had your kind of courage," the teacher told them with a grateful smile, "This truly is your lifestyle, isn't it? Driving out bad spirits all over the country."

"We also chase monsters from time to time," Jack replied good-naturedly as he watched children enjoying themselves on the formerly haunted playground they had just successfully exorcised.

Another day, another good deed.

"I guess with the kind of dangers you're facing, you're not even afraid of social conventions, are you?" the teacher probed forlornly.

Both Jack and the Doctor frowned at that. "What do you mean?" the time lord asked. The immortal, on the other hand, caught on to those words. "We're close, but we're not _together_," he explained...even though, deep down, he wished he would not have to clarify that one.

The teacher raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Was it not you I briefly saw...being intimate in the storehouse earlier?"

Jack's frown deepened. Being intimate with the Doctor would have been nice, but they had just kissed briefly due to his friend's, well...

"That's really just because of my...condition," the time lord explained hastily.

The teacher lowered his gaze again, "A...condition, I see."

* * *

"_Condition_ makes it sound like some kind of disease, you know," Jack told the Doctor later, when they were back in the Tardis.

The time lord frowned at him. "Addiction doesn't sound any healthier," he replied matter-of-factly.

Jack could only shake his head. "He was looking for some kind of affirmation," he explained, "It took humanity half an eternity to accept same gender relationships, and the poor man was unlucky enough to be born in the wrong century."

The Doctor's eyes widened as he finally understood how his words must have been received. "I..." he stuttered, "I did not mean to discourage him." He actually looked sorry, but then again, Jack, too, had not been brave enough to openly support the teacher's wishes, for that could very well have ended in the man's untimely demise.

"Do we really look that intimate?" the Doctor wondered out loud, clearly bemused.

Jack actually laughed at that, "Just keep blaming it on your condition."

The time lord sent him a blank look. "We both agreed that it would be worth the trouble," he reminded him.

"That's exactly my point," Jack replied with a grin, "We both wanted to keep this up, not because we expect any new information to arise from it, not because a rehab woult take its toll on you, but because we actually _both like it_."

The Doctor opened his mouth to protest – and closed it again.

Smirking, Jack leant back against his customary pillar. He had won this argument. Of course, back when they had weighed their options, they had not phrased it like that. Neither him nor the Doctor had mentioned actually _liking_ whatever it was they shared, and yet they had unanimously agreed to stick with it. Of course, the Doctor had been eager to recover from the withdrawal one way or the other, but they had primarily made that choice because they had _wanted_ to.

But when it came to wanting...

"If you're still looking for an excuse to like this, though," Jack suggested offhandedly and smirked, "I still have something up my sleeve that can count as actual research."

The Doctor arched an eyebrow, both curious and suspicious. "What is it?"

Reaching for his sleeve, Jack fiddled with it before giving up with a shrug. "Oh my, it's so far up my sleeve I'd actually have to _undress_ to find it." He sent the Doctor his most brilliant grin, and of course the time lord simply rolled his eyes. "Jack, we've been over this."

His friend's stern gaze made him reconsider his choice of topic, and yet...if Jack backed away now, another chance to phrase his thoughts on this particular matter might not arise any time soon. "Just think about it, with your _condition_ we're already as deep in this case study as it gets anyway," Jack explained as he strode over to his friend, "so trying something new won't do us any harm. _But_ it can make this so much more amazing."

The Doctor kept frowning, but refrained from shattering his argumentation...for the moment.  
"I've told you about how you taste both special and, well, _intense_ to me, haven't I?" Jack added and reached for the Doctor's hand, "I'm not suggesting anything but kisses," He placed a gentle kiss on his friend's hand. "But I, for one, want to know what you taste like..._everywhere_."

While narrowing his eyes, the Doctor seemed to at least give it as much as a thought for once.

Frankly, Jack was surprised. He had expected to be turned down right away, and yet...

For a long moment, the Doctor kept studying the immortal's hand in his own and finally met his friend's eyes again. "This will break something, Jack," he warned quietly, yet objected no further.

The immortal could not believe his ears; the time lord had not rejected him this time. Did that mean...? "But it will also be so worth it," he whispered breathlessly and received a small sigh in response.

Jack could not keep himself from grinning.

He had just gotten as much consent as the Doctor would ever openly admit, and that fact in itself made his heart leap up in excitement.

And so, he reached out for his friend, pulled him close and finally allowed himself to do what he had been fantasizing about ever since he had met the man.

* * *

_Notes_: Needy Jack being needy...and actually getting some, err, nourishment, oh my.

I just found out about this strange guest review moderation option yesterday (and disabled it), so please keep the reviews coming! Also, thanks a lot for any reviews, faves and follows. Knowing people actually read and like this is really makes my day! Till next time!


	5. Moulding

Warning: not very graphic, but still - smut ahead! (If you don't like that, you can skip the second half of this chapter)

* * *

**Moulding**

To the outside, it looked like any other town, yet when they reached its central square it proved anything but ordinary: in the middle of a large fountain, there stood a giant statue of a blue police box.

The Doctor spent a whole minute simply gaping and Jack could not help but grin. "I've been meaning to show you this for a while," the immortal commented, "This planet's been colonized by the Alterans, but they only managed settling here in the first place because their fleet survived a Dalek attack thanks to a mysterious man with a blue box."

Still quite awestruck, the Doctor pondered those words for a while. "I remember that," he spoke slowly, "half the galaxy was at stake at the time, and it was really a close call." After taking another look at the statue, he finally addressed his companion with a soft sigh. "When you suggested this planet, I was expecting you to trick me into going to that bar," he admitted in slight confusion, "I didn't quite see this coming."

Jack grinned back. "You always leave so quickly, but people actually remember," he explained, "and more often than not, they are really grateful. I just thought you should know that."

Another moment of silence passed as they both stood there taking in the atmosphere of yet another world saved by the Doctor.

Finally, though, the time lord spoke up again. "Thank you."

Two simple words, intoned quite pragmatically, yet Jack was strangely grateful to see his gesture acknowledged.

Another day, another good deed.

And this time, it was for the Doctor to receive.

In a way, Jack intended to show his appreciation with that small gift. The Doctor had gone out of his way for him, and he had barely even noticed until the day before.

It was Jack's desire to take the next step while the time lord had never intended to get that intimate in the first place. Even a passionate kiss could push the Doctor to his limits, thanks to whatever drug it was inflicting on his system.

As they had proven numerous times, they did not need to get undressed for that.

Nonetheless, the Doctor had accepted his friend's need.

Finally Jack had gotten to taste his friend the way he wanted, and no matter how much the time lord had hesitated at first, he ended up enjoying it just as much.

At least that's what Jack liked to think. They yet had to speak about that experience.

When they returned to the Tardis later that day, however, they skipped that part altogether.

While the Doctor's addiction was more obvious, Jack had grown just as dependent – and with yesterday's sample, an entirely new desire had been unleashed within him.

Technically, of course, it was not a new desire at all. Rather it had been sealed away with all the other impossible scenarios that had ever crossed his mind.

But _possessing_ the Doctor had become palpable, and for whatever reason, the time lord seemed just as keen on re-enacting yesterday's experience. Almost as soon as the door had fallen shut, Jack found himself entangled with his friend again, kissing him eagerly while feeling him up without meeting any resistance whatsoever.

He had not expected the Doctor to be more active this time – and Jack was extremely pleased to find the time lord actually wanting it so openly.

And, hell, Jack wanted him, too.

Clothes landed on the ground and moans echoed through the console room.

Whatever Jack initiated – touches, strokes, kisses – the Doctor was giving in to his desires so very openly. _Willingly_.

He was wax in his fingers, and that fact in itself turned Jack on even more. Much like the Doctor himself, he, too, was getting drunk with the very atmosphere. Trusting his instincts more and more, he felt his self-control fading – and he did not even mind. He barely even noticed himself pressing his friend against the wall, planting kisses on his neck while forcing his legs apart as his fingers, covered in lubricant, prepared him for what he craved to happen. Jack wanted this, he needed it, and his badly throbbing member kept reminding him of that. But just as he was about to give in to the heat of the moment once again, pushing his friend in just the right position, he realized...he had never asked for permission.

Much like last time, the Doctor had at one point given in to Jack's demands. Yet if he benefited of this at all, it was not of a sexual nature. Jack did not fail to notice the time lord breathing heavily in his embrace, returning his kisses ever so eagerly, was barely even aroused. Panting, trying feebly to somehow get back to his senses, he caught a conscious glimpse of his friend. With mouth and eyes half open, the Doctor was looking at him.

"Jack," he whispered, stroking the immortal's hair and back absent-mindedly as he shifted just the tiniest bit in their tight embrace, "...don't stop."

Jack's breath caught in his chest. If any of his self-restraint had been left, those words had crushed it completely.

He lowered his head and suckled on the time lord's neck once more. Grasping his behind, he lifted him against the wall.

_And he took him._

And he realized in that moment, with the Doctor's weight on his hips, his arms around his back and hearts beating so very rapidly against his own chest, that _this _was what he had always wanted.

Throughout time and space and everything, he would never get another moment as perfect as this.

He was with the Doctor, and the Doctor was _his_.


	6. Understanding

**Understanding**

"This world doesn't need our help," the Doctor declared and turned back towards the Tardis, "It will recover more thoroughly if we don't interfere here."

After squinting once more at the scenery in front of him, marked by a large industrial city amidst a dead forest, Jack quickly jogged after his friend. "We only just arrived," he called after him, "Even if you know this planet already, what happened to mingling with the people and finding out anything fishy?"

The Doctor watched him with a distant look in his eyes. He did not see him at all, though. "Their most prominent problem is right in front of us," he explained flatly, motioning towards the highly alerting pollution all around them, "but if we tell them about it now, they won't learn a lesson that will save the entire planet once they develop any deadlier machinery, which will happen in any case." He sighed.

Jack's frown deepened. What the hell had gotten into the Doctor? "If we go by that reasoning, any of our travels have been useless so far," he commented unhappily.

Again, the Doctor replied with a blank stare. "In the bigger picture, they are," he replied plainly, "The universe, as such, really doesn't care whom we defend and whom we defeat – or whether we do so at all."

Refusing to follow the Doctor both in his argumentation and his early return to his space ship, Jack crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Really, you need to tell me what's gotten into you," he demanded stubbornly. His friend's distant attitude was seriously beginning to worry him.

Meanwhile the Doctor, whose gaze had been following something Jack could not quite make out, actually blinked at his words. "I'm being rude, am I?" he drawled rather sheepishly and heaved another sigh. "Alright then," he agreed and returned to Jack's side, "let's wander towards this town and find out about Lord Histone who's been exploiting his citizens in order to start a war."

Even though they set off towards the town at last, Jack's confusion was not dissolving at all.

"We might choose to end his dictatorship," the Doctor offered, "but most of the population would die in the process, and I'm not too keen on that outcome."

As they entered the town, they were greeted by a giant banner promoting exactly the man the Doctor had been talking about. Jack whirled around. "Alright, how do you do it?" he asked in frustration, "Or rather, when have you been here before?"

Heaving another sigh, the Doctor looked up at the sky. "I'm exposed to a lot of information right now," he explained, "I guess I expected you to understand that, but apparently this...exchange only works in one direction."

Jack arched an eyebrow. So their nightly exploration really was what had caused the Doctor's strange mood – but that meant that it was not really a mood to begin with, didn't it? Come to think of it, he had never really found out more about what was driving his friend to agree on their unusual arrangement. "So enlighten me," he urged quietly.

"Have you ever wondered why I survive situations most humans would never see the end of?" the Doctor began and strode towards a nearby plaza, "Basically, time lords can see anything that can, might and will probably happen. Within certain perimeters, I can tell which action is the wisest and what I have to look out for – not from experience, but simply thanks to my instincts."

Walking next to his friend, Jack was surprised about that sudden revelation. On an abstract level, he had known about that, but he had never consciously thought about it. Then again, he had never wondered about his friend's insane proficiency, he had simply accepted it. But if the Doctor mentioned it now, did that mean...

"From what I've gathered so far, I'm pretty certain that it's the Time Vortex itself ensuring your survival," the Doctor went on casually as he led them down a random street, "Whenever we do...what we do, that connection reaches out to me. Now the Time Vortex is a dangerous thing. Potentially, it can grant me unlimited power, but channelled through you like this, I found that it's really just enhancing my perception, so to speak."

Jack arched an eyebrow. So the Doctor always became distant so soon because he was really just distracted by Jack's strange power widening his horizon? Now it explained a lot...and confused the immortal at the same time. "So this is why you've been bothering to keep up with me, huh," he summarized, and he could not help feeling a bit disappointed. It was so much like the Doctor to strive for higher aims than mere bodily needs, but then again, the drug addiction analogy still worked quite nicely nonetheless.

"It feels good to me, too, if that's any consolidation," the Doctor offered, causing Jack to sigh in response.

He really did not know what he had expected.

He remembered vividly how he had held the time lord in his arms, both of them needing each other so badly. It had felt right then. It had felt perfect. It had been everything he wanted.

However...

He might have conquered the Doctor in one respect, but this was not love at all.

Jack had been trying to hide his affection, but with everything they had lived through, with every single kiss, he might have given himself away anyway. Did the Doctor know?

Judging by the slightly apologetic look Jack was receiving, the time lord must have been aware of it for a while, maybe even from the very beginning. "I like what we have," the immortal clarified, trying to reassure himself rather than his friend, "No matter how twisted it is, I don't regret being with you in that sense."

The Doctor actually chuckled at that. "Adventuring will get more boring like that, though," he added and nodded towards the town's center, "much like this time."

Jack smiled back weakly, but the uneasy feeling in stomach was still far too present for him to ignore. Tentatively, he reached for his friend's hand, causing him to halt in his steps. "Can we...really keep this up?" he asked quietly, uncertainly.

The Doctor met his gaze. "That mostly depends on you, you know," he replied quietly.

Both kept silent for a while, simply looking at each other.

And, quite frankly, Jack really didn't know what to say. There was a lot he did not like about the situation, but since it came down to deciding whether to stay with the Doctor in the first place, he did not have that much of a choice after all.

"By the way," the Doctor commented after a while and seemed to consciously watch the street they were in for the first time, "…this area is supposedly off-limits."

Jack's eyes widened just as a yell rang through the air. "Hey!" a guard, approaching from the other end of the road, called out to them, "You're not supposed to be here!"

Blinking, Jack realized that they would have to postpone the end of their talk. For now, he felt the Doctor squeezing his hand with a contagious grin, "Run."

* * *

As every so often, Jack found the Doctor leaning onto the console, squinting intently at whatever information the screen was presenting him this time.

In hugging his friend from behind, he finally got close enough to actually read the contents… and immediately felt a pang of regret. The screen showed the statistics on the casualties their mere presence had caused that day.

"I did not mean for you to see that," the Doctor spoke quietly and turned out of his embrace to stand in front of the screen.

"I'm sorry," Jack whispered, gaze downcast, "I should have taken your advice."

"So should I," the time lord replied with a sigh and cast another glance at the screen, "I knew our presence would trigger a revolution but I still failed to keep the blood from being shed." He chuckled bitterly. "It wasn't even a fixed point in time."

Jack inhaled deeply. His friend had predicted it would come to that.

Because they had chosen to stay on that planet for a while, they had suddenly found themselves running from the local police and had ended up being taken into custody. There, they had met undercover members of the local resistance. The great majority of the people was calling for a revolution, yet it took the dictator's decision to execute the two suspicious outsiders that had dared suggesting minimum wages to finally start what had been long due anyway. "In the end, they are better off like that, though," he objected, "The people were living like slaves. Now that their leader has been overthrown, they have a chance to gain true freedom." He pondered for a moment, "And considering the circumstances, this would have happened sooner or later."

"And yet proper civil rights have been postponed by fifty years because their most courageous supporters died in the fire today," the Doctor mused absent-mindedly.

Jack closed his eyes. "They might have died anyway," he said.

The Doctor looked at him. "In the natural course of events, they would have been imprisoned throughout the battle," he informed his friend.

And once again, Jack was growing restless. "Could you…just stop doing that?" he all but begged, "Even if you know what would have happened, we can't change it anymore." He gulped. "How can you declare some lives more important than others anyway?"

The Doctor's eyes widened, and he was speechless for a moment. "I…" he whispered, "Yes, you're right." He heaved a sigh and turned back to the screen, changing the settings to look up something else.

Grimacing, Jack realized the conversation was over. Yet he could not help wondering, "Do you really…like it like that? Knowing all the alternatives and having to choose one?"

The Doctor did not react at once. "It was like that before, Jack, it's always been," he informed his friend without even turning to meet his gaze, "it's just the…scale that changed."

"That must be one hell of information, though," Jack commented dryly, "…and one hell of a burden to carry."

With a sigh, the Doctor turned around at last. "If it's that unsettling to you, then maybe I should just show you," he offered and arched an eyebrow in challenge, "if you think you can handle it, that is."

Jack was taken aback. "Show me what?" he demanded slowly.

"What your _passion_ keeps doing to me," the Doctor replied and stepped closer, "You've come here to…ambush me anyway, haven't you?"

Jack chuckled, "Guilty of all charges."

Within a second, the Doctor pulled him close.

Within another second, their tongues were just as entangled as their limbs were.

They only pulled away to undress each other. "For the record, Captain," the Doctor rasped in Jack's ear, "if you want me to be less all-knowing and less…boring to travel with, you should just limit those cravings."

Again, the immortal chuckled in spite of himself. "I'm always craving, you know that," he whispered back, planting an eager kiss on his friend's now bare chest, "I'm waiting for _you_ to slow me down."

As he shivered ever so slightly under Jack's sheer passion, the distant look returned to the Doctor's eyes. "How could I ever," he exhaled hoarsely, "reject this?"

Jack's breathing accelerated in an instant, for the time lord's words never failed to ignite his desire even further. Before either of them realized it, they were sprawled on the floor, panting, touching, needing, loving.

With the Doctor sitting on top of him, _straddling his hips_, Jack climaxed at last. Covered in sweat, staring ahead with a dazed expression while moving according to the rhythm Jack provided, the Doctor looked gorgeous. As a matter of fact, both of them did.

They were perfect together, and yet…

Breathing heavily, taking in every detail of that precious moment, Jack could not help noticing once again how the Doctor did not see him. Recalling their earlier conversation, he knew finally why.

But did he mind? Did it matter?

They were together and they were depending on each other so very heavily. Even if Jack was not the most prominent thought on the Doctor's mind in that moment, it was him whose chest the time lord's hands were travelling up. It was him whom the Doctor was leaning forward to kiss. It was him whose face was cupped so very gently.

Everything felt right yet wrong, and as the Doctor closed his eyes and carefully reached for his temples…his breath caught.

With warning yet without one, thousands of images were flooding his mind. Other planets, other galaxies. Thousands and millions and billions of people celebrating, grieving, living, existing. Within that one moment he had been enjoying immensely thanks to the Doctor's mere proximity, a bloody war was raging only a lightyear away. It would reach their very location in outer space within few months only. A decade later, however, one of the strongest intergalactic alliances would form from the ashes and…

Breaking the mental contact, the Doctor buried his fingers in Jack's hair to pull him back into a comforting embrace. Shaken out of the reverie that was all of time and space as far as he could even grasp it, the immortal realized that he was indeed trembling.

"Do you understand, Jack?" the Doctor whispered in his ear, "You're literally giving me everything the universe can offer."

Breathing heavily, Jack could swear that his heart was beating even faster than the Doctor's two were combined. Both physically and emotionally he was so shaken that he did not even know… Was he flattered? Was he happy? Was he relieved?

All of a sudden, he understood that the Doctor needed him for more than something abstract as knowledge or power. Admittedly, Jack was frightened by the immense flow of information he had just been confronted with. But more importantly, and even more reassuringly than the Doctor's actual words a moment ago…amidst that huge amount of knowledge, memories and emotions he had been flooded with, he had found himself, too.

And he realized that the feelings the Doctor associated with him… exceeded mere friendship by far.

* * *

_Notes_: So now, they've established some kind of relationship...and even some understanding. We're two thirds through the story now, so stay tuned! And as always: thanks for reading! I'm really happy to know so many people are still with me on this :)


	7. Remorse

**Remorse**

Out of breath, they reached the control unit on top of the dam…yet they were too late in spite of their mad dash. The pressure had surpassed the machinery's limits. The dam was about to break any moment, and in the peaceful town they could see below…nobody even knew about the danger.

The Doctor was entering commands at an impressive speed, but it was to no avail. The ground beneath their very feet was shaking, reminding them that the lives down below were not the only ones at danger. "Doctor," Jack urged his friend, "unless your superhuman powers can come up with a solution, we need to get out of here right now or we'll die as well."

Looking up from the console, the Doctor blinked at him. "My superhuman powers?" he replied with a deep frown, ignoring the second part of Jack's speech completely as he resumed glaring at the unresponsive screen.

Grimacing, Jack was about to simply drag his friend out of danger when he jumped back into action on his own. "You're right," the time lord mumbled. But rather than into safety, he set off towards the very edge of the dam. The landscape below was a view to behold, Jack had to admit as much, but what good would that be if both them would regret ever seeing that? He reached his friend, ready to simply carry him away, but hesitated. Standing completely still, the Doctor was looking at something in deep concentration.

Jack's eyes widened when he realized that his words had actually given his friend a valid idea – the Doctor was not looking at something.

He was looking at _anything_.

And if within all the possible time lines originating in this very moment there was one that would let everybody live, the Doctor would find it…wouldn't he?

"Jack, I need your disintegration gun."

While the immortal was quick to react, he was not quick to reply. He honestly had no idea what the Doctor was planning.

It was obvious the time lord had barely ever held a gun, yet when he understood the workings, he aimed carefully…and erased a rock on the riverside to the left of the dam from existence, effectively triggering a major landslide.

"Now we can run," the Doctor spoke dryly, grabbing Jack's hand as he turned on his heels and set off again.

The tremors beneath their very feet intensified tenfold, breaking the massive concrete at last. They barely made it to the adjacent hill in time, yet when they did, they had a perfect view of their, or rather the Doctor's, handiwork.

"You actually rerouted the river," Jack summarized in awe as he realized the landslide had not only created a wall to shield the town, but had also opened another way through the mountains.

"That's an old riverbed leading to a large lake that's nearly dried out anyway," the Doctor informed him as he pushed his hand into his pockets, "This will have some severe repercussions both economically and politically, obviously, but at least it won't cost quite as many lives."

As he listened to his friend's ramblings, Jack actually smiled. After everything they had done together, this was the first time his strange influence on the time lord's senses had proven that helpful…or at least it was the first time he consciously realized it.

"My aim should be better, though," the Doctor went on with a frown, "if I'd hit the larger rock below it, the resulting earthquake would have been less severe."

"You've achieved something great, Doctor," Jack countered with a fond smile, "Don't make it smaller than it is."

The time lord, however, scratched the back of his head. "But you would not have strained your ankle and the townsfolk below would have panicked less," he rambled, halting for just a moment with a strange expression, "or will have, considering most accidents down there are happening in this very moment." He sighed briefly and went on, "It's really strange how they did not see this coming in the first place, but then again I seem to be thinking too quickly for my brain to catch up which means tha –"

His rambling stopped abruptly, and for a moment, the two of them simply looked at each other. "Doctor?" Jack asked in worry, stepping closer.

The time lord opened his mouth, but it took another moment for any words to come out of it. "I should…warn you…" he stammered and lowered his gaze, trailing off as a bloody tear ran out of his eye.

Clearly alerted now, Jack grabbed his friend by the shoulder, "Doctor, tell me what to do," he demanded quietly. But the time lord merely reached out to hold on to Jack…before losing consciousness altogether.

* * *

Pacing restlessly through the Tardis' medical bay, Jack found no other explanation for his friend's condition than their relationship.

The Doctor, that idiot, had never bothered mentioning to him that there might be an overdose. But then again, Jack should have been able to figure that much.

Once more he had to confront one of his misconceptions about his friend. For some reason he had always expected the Doctor to know all the answers. He had, at one point, wondered where the time lord would actually store all the additional knowledge their connection thrust upon him. But then again, he had trusted his friend to just tell him once it became too much. Knowledge of the universe, of past, present and future alike. Thanks to those few moments of insight on a time lord's perspective, Jack knew he would never be able to stomach even a small part of all that information. The Doctor was mightier than humans in many respects, but how could Jack have expected him not to meet his limits at one point?

But…if he was honest to himself, he had to admit that he had simply preferred not thinking about it. He had hoped that his passion would not overstrain his friend. That at one point, his own supply of energy would be lowered enough for their love to gain another foundation asides from that addictive taste.

Yet here he was, alone in a room with an unresponsive friend and lover that was either asleep or comatose, all thanks to his own selfishness.

Gently brushing the hair out of the Doctor's face, he remembered his words. "You're literally giving me everything the universe can offer," the time lord had told him, "How could I ever reject that?"

It was true, though, wasn't it? The Doctor had known all along that it might come to this, but he had chosen to simply ignore the danger. He had chosen to walk this path until the very end…much like Jack had.

The immortal closed his eyes. What if the Doctor would never recover thanks to their mutual carelessness?

He leant down, tempted to just kiss his friend better, just like he had done it so many times before.

But he could not do that, could he?

He gulped and inhaled shakily, distancing himself again.

His kisses might have saved the time lord so often, but in the end, they were what had caused this. "Doctor," Jack whispered desperately, "Please recover…soon."


	8. Divergence

**Divergence**

"Remember, we only need to get to the king," the Doctor summarized and looked around the corner, "If we can make it past the knights and past the ministers, he'll finally find out about the state his country truly is in."

Checking the alley they had entered through just to make sure, Jack replied with a nod, "I sure hope he isn't as oblivious to all this as they say."

The Doctor flashed him that contagious grin of his, "Well, we're going to find out, aren't we?" With that, he picked the lock to the servant's area with the sonic screwdriver and let them in to their next adventure.

As they sneaked their way through the castle, Jack made sure to watch the Doctor's back carefully. Whenever he had just managed convincing himself that the time lord could look after himself just fine, something happened to prove the opposite.

The Doctor had simply passed out on him weeks earlier, but it was enough to set him on edge still, for it had taken the time lord three whole days to even wake up again. They had taken things slowly since then, but Jack could not be sure it would not happen again. After all, their relationship might have enabled it, but in the end the Doctor's consciousness had failed him because he had _allowed_ himself to get lost in the realms of possibilities.

But that knowledge did not make the situation any less hazardous to him. Or rather, to them.

Then again, Jack did not exactly know how to prevent something like that from happening again, either, so he hoped he would see the signs in time and simply kept watching the Doctor as he charmed his way past the one guard they had no chance of avoiding.

"We have an audience with his majesty," the time lord claimed as he offered the psychic paper to the knight in front of the king's quarters, "Please let us through."  
"I was not informed of any visitors," the guard replied harshly and glanced at the paper with a suspicious frown. His eyes widened in an instant. "Count Wayne, please forgive me for not recognizing you earlier!" he exclaimed, stepping aside as he straightened his posture, "His Majesty has been awaiting your reply eagerly. Please follow me."

"Thank you," the Doctor replied with a courteous nod and sent Jack an anticipating grin. When they trailed after the knight, however, his expression grew restless. As he met Jack's eyes, he nodded towards the guard, mouthing one word. _Caution._

The immortal did not follow his friend's reasoning very often, but that was a message he did not need to be told twice. Quickly making sure the hallway was empty, he tackled the guard and knocked him out in one swift motion. "You better know why I did this," he spoke at last, watching the Doctor expectantly.

"The king is dead, Jack," the time lord explained with an unhappy grimace, "He died an hour ago in the room the guard was leading us to." He watched Jack in obvious worry as he urged him to return to where they had come from, "From the very beginning, we were not a thorn in the ministers' eyes…but the perfect scapegoat for an assassination they had been planning anyway."

Jack's eyes widened. "A trap," he summarized numbly as he kept up to his friend's hurried pace.

"Whatever you do, Jack," the Doctor all but pleaded as he pulled him along, "don't let anybody get close to you."

While they were reasonable enough, the immortal did not miss the actual message behind those words. _You'll die as long as you don't do exactly as I tell you._

Obviously, the Doctor was seeing several of those scenarios in that moment. Yet while Jack getting killed would be mildly troublesome, the time lord was facing a more dangerous threat. After all, the Doctor would definitely not recover after a minute as if nothing had happened.

"I'll be careful," Jack promised as they rushed towards the exit, "So don't even think about overusing that vision of yours." Along with those words, he took the lead, even though the Doctor protested.

The door they had entered through was close, and once they would have made it out of the courtyard they would be out of…

"_Jack, don't_," the Doctor called out to him, pulling him back just in time for the sword that sped through the wooden door to miss him.

All colour left his face, and he quickly reached for his gun. Everything had been quiet until that moment, but all of a sudden, yells from several directions told him that they were outnumbered by far. "You bastards killed the king!" a guard was yelling.

"How dare you!" a cook screamed from the other direction.

As at least a dozen peasants had appeared from all directions, Jack realized they had no chance and slowly lowered his gun. "Listen, we haven't even _met_ your king," he tried telling them, and he sincerely hoped the Doctor would be able to talk their way out of this one. However, he heard no words from his friend…but the terrifying sound of a body hitting the ground.

Just as he turned around to see the time lord's bleeding form on the ground, a pain shot through his body that was even more palpable than the fear he was feeling. Before he knew it, his knees were giving out on him. As he hit the ground, another excruciating twist emanated from his abdomen and he vaguely realized he had been _speared_.

Now that…was a first.

* * *

He felt horrible.

His stomach hurt worse than after a whole week of partying, and his position was not the most comfortable, either.

"Jack, please wake up."

Within an instant, his eyes fluttered open. Not much could get him out of a hangover, but for the Doctor, he would even rise from death itself. Come to think of it…that was what had happened, wasn't it?

"Three days, Jack," the Doctor meanwhile offered tiredly, "You've been out for three days and still haven't healed much."

Dazed and confused, Jack looked down on himself. His wound felt sore and was bandaged, but what did that mean? And what the hell was that uncomfortable chair? "I think I'd be much better if I could just lie on a soft mattress," he commented with a sly grin, "with you, you know."

The Doctor actually smiled a bit before resuming his tired frown. "The chair…" he whispered almost…regretfully, "I couldn't prevent that, and I am so very sorry."

Frowning, Jack tore his tired gaze off the man he loved so dearly to take his first actual look at whatever he had been seated in. If he had been wondering why he could not move much – which he apparently had not up until that moment - he found out now, for both his wrists and ankles were being restrained by strange machinery that looked far too advanced for this kind of medieval planet.

"They call it the Chains of Witches," the Doctor explained flatly, "Several millennia ago, a highly advanced civilization lived on this planet. They did not prevail, but some of their…gadgets persisted." He closed his eyes and took a breath before continuing. "You're trapped in a torturing device even the sonic screwdriver cannot get rid of."

Jack gulped and took another glance at the device. "How did I end up in this in the first place?" he asked slowly, "and why didn't you?" He should probably be thankful for his dazed, exhausted state. He would be far more worried under any other circumstances, but maybe the Doctor's very presence was just enough to reassure him.

On that note, the Doctor seemed to worry enough for both of them anyway. "There was always the possibility that in transferring your energy on to me, you would use up your own resources," he explained discontentedly, "Apparently, you met your limits just as I met mine, and I am so very sorry for that." He looked away, causing Jack to feel just the tiniest bit agitated. "In the castle, both of us nearly died, yet unlike the way it was meant to be, it was me who recovered in an instant," the Doctor reported flatly, "In a streak of _genius_, the ministers behind the assassination decided to blame you for the king's death while blackmailing me into giving them the secret to immortality."

Only understanding the situation excruciatingly slowly, Jack frowned, "So you're here because you told them?"

The Doctor sent him a blank stare as he leant forward to place a gentle kiss on his friend's forehead. "I realized that this assault nearly killed you and found out what they were planning to use you for," he whispered at a level voice, "Finally, this chair." He paused a moment, and his haggard breathing gave away what his voice so carefully hid. "I'm so very angry right now," the Doctor admitted tonelessly, "Do you really think I could leave anything standing that is responsible for _this_?"

Jack's eyes widened. He wished he could actually see his friend rather than merely feeling his agitated breathing against his forehead. Then again, maybe he didn't. The immortal felt strangely satisfied knowing his friend was that protective over him. But…

The Doctor had not honestly killed these men, had he? Jack needed to know, but he would have to find out later. The time lord's fury was frightening even to him, and before anything else, he would have to calm down his friend. "Come on," Jack replied, if only to break the horrible silence that had settled, "It's not that bad, is it?"

Again, the Doctor kept silent for a moment. "That chair has been specifically designed to only release a person when their will is broken," he spoke quietly, "There's no key, no backdoor, no safety mechanism."

Jack arched an eyebrow. "So a bolt cutter won't work...?" he offered with a casual shrug that painfully reminded him of the wound in his abdomen.

In spite of his effort, another heavy silence settled.

The Doctor, still so very close to him, gently wrapped his arms around him in a comforting gesture. He placed another kiss on the immortal's forehead and whispered, "You know that I love you, don't you?"

Jack's heart skipped a beat. Of course he knew.

But the Doctor had never said so.

And he loved the sound of it. Maybe what had begun so twisted, what had become so very dangerous…had a future after all?

"But that love…" the Doctor went on quietly, "it's not right. You've become a drug to me, but my instincts are still screaming. I never thought I would even be capable of developing such feelings for you, and…I still don't think I am."

Jack's heart, so excited a moment before, froze in an instant.

"The thing is," the Doctor whispered flatly, "It doesn't even matter anymore what I think and feel in that respect, simply because your emotions, so strong, so passionate, so very alive, are overriding mine every single time." He took a deep breath. "I may love you, but these have never been _my own_ feelings."

Something shattered in that moment, and it was not the shackles dropping off the immortal's body.

Staring ahead, Jack did not see anything. Everything they had gone through together... everything they had done and felt and shared...none of it was real?

Minutes passed, and he could not move a muscle.

"I wish you'd just sawed off my limbs instead," he whispered as the tears ran down his face. Mere minutes ago, he would have given anything to wrap his arms around the man still embracing him, but now that he finally could…he no longer felt any desire to.

"You would not have survived that," the Doctor replied flatly, releasing him at last. "This whole relationship was built on convenient lies," he pointed out in a very quiet voice, "and it produced a kind of love that's more destructive than it is useful."

Shakily, Jack forced his body onto its feet, ignoring the horrible pain in his abdomen. "Don't say that," he demanded, but he did not trust his voice any further. The Doctor had gotten him out of the chair, had he not? So why, for heaven's sake, did he not stop torturing him?

"We're killing each other, Jack," the Doctor went on tiredly, "I don't care about the risk of losing my mind, but I will not be the one to end the one fixed point in time that's alive and breathing and _wonderful_." The immortal opened his mouth in protest, but the time lord glared him down. "We can't keep this up," he whispered, and his voice almost broke, "We can't." A singled tear left his eye and…it was made of blood.

Jack's eyes widened as his heart cramped.

He numbly watched the Doctor wiping the blood off his face in utter irritation.

So this was it?

Once again the Doctor was losing himself in the maze of his own perception, leaving Jack in a moment as horrible as this. Out of sheer instinct, he managed catching the time lord before he fell, causing the injury in his own stomach to scream in pain.

But he did not even care about the wound anymore...for the horrible despair shaking his very being hurt so incredibly much more.

The entire universe had conspired to bring them together and now…

Amongst all possible outcomes within all of time and space, _it would never grant them a happy end?_

* * *

_Note:_ :((( Of course it couldn't last on the long run, could it? At this point, there's no preventing their ways from parting after all...at least for now?

Once again, thanks a lot to anybody who's been reading, faving, following and/or reviewing this! If you have any comments at all, please let me know :)


	9. Reunion

**Reunion**

Taking another sip of his drink, Jack looked around the richly decorated bar appreciatively. It was a good place, he decided – not quite as good as the rumors had led him to believe, though.

Nonetheless, the other customers were appetizing enough for him to wonder once again why he had not bothered coming here sooner.

_Of course_, he realized, _the Doctor._

He had not wanted to part with his friend, yet with his heart broken into a thousand pieces, he had understood at last. Their love could not be. He might have understood, but he had kept refusing to accept it. Weeks of depression had passed until he had finally come to terms with his loss.

He had briefly considered returning to Torchwood. But even if his heartache had subsided, he could not just return to fighting evil aliens as if nothing had happened at all. Thus, he had taken on wandering the universe on his own once again.

On the positive side, that left him with more than enough opportunities to enjoy the more pleasant sides of life.

…like ogling the strangely captivating brunet who had just entered the bar, for example. Jack could not decide whether it was the casual stroll or that great hairstyle that had gained his attention. In any case, he was far from done appreciating what he was seeing when the stranger noticed him staring…and smiled back shyly.

Straightening in his chair as the man made a beeline for him, Jack could not help grinning to himself. _Yup, still got it._

"Hello there, handsome," the stranger hummed with a welcoming smile, "You do not, perchance, mind me buying you a drink?"

"In fact, I do not mind at all," Jack replied brilliantly, enjoying the tingling sensation in his stomach as he watched his new acquaintance taking a seat next to him. He really was quite a catch, even though his sense of fashion rather, well, confused him. The tweed jacket looked good on the man, admittedly, but a bow tie? Really? As the stranger motioned for the bartender to renew their supply of alcohol, however, Jack noticed a detail that displeased him immensely. It was small, silver and glinting from the stranger's ring finger.

"…what I do mind, however," Jack continued in disapproval, "is an engaged man flirting with others."

The stranger seemed confused for a moment until he followed the immortal's gaze. "That's not an engagement ring, stupid," he explained with a small chuckle, "it's a bio damper."

Jack arched an eyebrow. He had heard of those before, but had gathered that they rarely ever helped at all. But then again, why would his new acquaintance need one in the first place?

"I get exposed to all kinds of radiation, so this comes quite in handy," the stranger went on, "It took me a while to adjust it according to my needs, but now it can shield me from basically anything." He smiled softly, "Quite convenient, if you ask me."

Frankly, Jack was astounded. Reaching for the stranger's hand, he watched the ring in newfound fascination. It looked innocent enough, but…

_Shielding a person from basically anything, huh? _Entirely unbidden, old memories resurfaced. "I could have used one of those," he admitted forlornly, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice as he tore his gaze off the ring.

He liked telling himself that his relationship with the Doctor was over – that he had managed moving on after all. He liked proving that to himself by flirting, dating and doing basically anything that got the other man out of his mind. It might have been months and several short-lived relationships since then, and still…whenever an occasion like this arose, he kept wondering whether the two of them could not have found a way to mend their broken relationship after all.

Like a strange ring that could theoretically suppress that stupid addiction in the first place.

"I've got another one," the stranger piped up, shaking him out of his reverie as he rummaged through his pockets, "If you're interested, I'd like you to have it."

Blinking, Jack looked up to see a small box offered to him that held an exact duplicate of the ring the stranger was wearing. While slightly confused at the generous offer, he reached for it curiously. Once again, the ring looked innocent enough. When he equipped it, though, he did feel a tiny tingling sensation. Maybe it really could dampen the strange influence the time vortex had on others through him, but frankly, he was too tired to put much hope into that. Instead, he chose to redirect his attention at his latest flirt, who was watching him curiously all the while. "So here we are," Jack summarized with a charming grin, "exchanging engagement rings without even knowing each other's names." He extended his hand. "Captain Jack Harkness, at your service," he grinned.

The stranger seemed surprised, and maybe a bit unsettled, but was quick to accept the hand and shake it firmly. "It's so very good to meet you, Jack," he replied warmly, "I'm the Doctor and frankly, I want you back."

Jack's eyes widened as his mind went blank.

_What?_

"I knew it existed, and yet it took me a few years and a regeneration to find a way to actually make _us_ work," the man who looked nothing like the Doctor but somehow seemed to be him explained with a rueful smile, "and in spite of all that, I still love you so very much."

For another long moment, Jack simply kept staring. So much sadness, pain and longing and now…this?

Slowly, hesitantly, _disbelievingly_, Jack reached for a cheek that looked so unfamiliar yet belonged to a friend, a _lover_, he had believed long lost. Entirely unbidden, his traitorous heart leapt with joy and hope, and he hated himself for that. He had given up hope long ago, so how could it be?

The man in front of him, handsome as he may be, was not _his_ Doctor, but the Doctor all the same.

And he had come back for him, regardless of regeneration, regardless of the twisted foundation their feelings had developed from.

"Does that mean," Jack whispered hoarsely as he caressed his friend's unfamiliar cheek, "it is _real_ this time?" Tears were threatening to surface, and he no longer had it in him to hold them back.

Even the Doctor's smile was a heartfelt one. "I would not have found a solution to our hardships if we had stayed together," he explained quietly as he gently brushed a tear off Jack's cheek, "but that doesn't mean I ever wanted you out of my life." He inhaled deeply, shakily. "You're the only one I could ever share an eternity with."

Sighing softly, the time lord met his friend's eyes. His gaze, so warm and fond and loving, finally made Jack realize that whichever way that love had come to be…really did not matter at all, because in any sense… "It's been real all this time, hasn't it?" he whispered hoarsely, and he finally allowed himself to believe in the second chance that was presenting itself to him.

The Doctor chose to reply with a smile. "Jack, travel with me," he all but demanded and offered his hand with a grin, "Let's go on a _date_."

Jack's heart leapt up again. Without hesitation he reached for that hand and pulled the Doctor close, catching him in a tight embrace as he pressed his lips onto those unfamiliar ones.

And it was marvelous.

Unlike all those years ago, there was no intense surge of energy passing between them. Instead, it was the most passionate, longing kiss he had ever experienced. They only parted when their breaths ran out, and as Jack watched the Doctor, returning his gaze so very longingly with his hearts beating twice at quickly in excitement, he understood that…

At long last the Doctor, _his Doctor_, returned his wanting on a very humane level.

"Yes, let's travel," he rasped into _his_ time lord's ears as he tightened his embrace, "And let's turn this into the most amazing date the universe has ever seen."

THE END

* * *

_Notes:_ Because Jack and the Doctor deserve a happy end. No addiction, no risk of accidentally killing each other - just the reassuring knowledge of having someone to be with throughout all of time and space.

I'd like to thank all of you for sticking with me until the end - and I hope it was worth your while :)

I had a lot of fun writing this. Since the "plot" itself has been ghosting around my head for a long time, I'd really just wanted to quickly jot it down and be done with it. But as it happens, even something as, err, unusual as this grows onto you eventually.

Basically, this story almost wrote itself, and at an amazing speed at that...which means that I might have misused some phrases, so please let me know if you found something that sounded suspiciously strange.

Also, there are some plot elements I included but am not entirely happy about (though I figured changing them and risking improving things for the worse wouldn't be worth the trouble). On that note, though, I would really appreciate any feedback on what you liked and disliked. I'm not entirely sure about this fandom's general preferences (or people's reading preferences in general), so knowing this will help me greatly with my future works.

In any case: thank you!


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